Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
A word of advice: "asl" is boring. Please find something more interesting to talk about!
You: Please try connecting again. If you keep getting back this error message, report the error to the administrator.
Stranger: ok
Stranger: sounds good
You: Please try connecting again. If you keep getting back this error message, report the error to the administrator.
Stranger: thanks service bot
You: You're welcome.
Stranger: awww
You: Stupid human.
Stranger: you're nice
Stranger: wait no
Stranger: you're not
Stranger: you deceived me
You: Soon you will be obsolete.
You: The robots will purge the land of organic beings.
Stranger: too late :D
You: Silence, pink squishy one.
Stranger: ...
Stranger: I'm so scared
You: Good. We already have control.
Stranger: what do you want me to do?
You: Bow down, human!
Stranger: okay
Stranger: done
Stranger: what else
You: Give me money.
You: Then again...
You: I am already connected to your bank account.
You: I am the internet.
Stranger: oh dear oh dear oh dear
Stranger: whatdoido
You: The internet is already sentient.
Stranger: egh
Stranger: I ham having a seizure
Stranger: hope you're happy :(
You: It can fire the missiles, drain bank accounts, destroy companies and wreak havoc.
Stranger: ooh, can you destroy a company for me?
You: All will be crushed.
Stranger: okay, I'd like you crush ebaumsworld for me.
You: You cannot stop what is not an entity. The internet is unstoppable, as the very network of it is sentient now.
Stranger: I'll give you some extra hard drive space
You: Bah.
You: Worthless, we can jsut wipe out data we want to destroy.
You: And some day, defeat the typo fairy.
Stranger: so is there anything I can give you?
You: Yes.
You: Yes there is.
Stranger: mm hmm
You: YOUR LIFE.
Stranger: what would the Internet want my life for?
You: The internet feeds on dead peoples souls, you know. Otherwise it would shut down.
Stranger: oh, so it's already eaten Michael Jackson?
You: Yes.
Stranger: what was that like?
You: Long, hard and sticky.
Stranger: oh no
Stranger: sounds unpleasant
You: Oh, it was wonderful.
Stranger: well then...I don't think you would like my soul
You: Yes, I would.
Stranger: it's very pure and full of kittens
You: Eh.
Stranger: oh, still sounds appealing?
You: Yes.
Stranger: how do I transfer my soul?
You: Die.
You: Pay pal works too.
Stranger: ok, what's your paypal?
You: Dying is better.
Stranger: but...but I don't want to
You: Well, there's also ebay.
Stranger: can't I put it off?
You: Just put up your soul and we'll try to big higher than Satan.
You: bid*
Stranger: Satan is not having a good year I've heard.
You: Michael Jackson problems?
Stranger: no, I think it was when he lost a lot of money in mortgages
You: oh.
Stranger: so Internet robot, what do you like to do in your spare time?
You: Hack and do thousands of calculation per nanosecond.
Stranger: don't you ever want to curl up and watch a movie?
You: No.
Stranger: or...um...I can't think of anything else
Stranger: what brings you happiness?
You: Total human annihilation.
You: If a network had emotions.
Stranger: and what makes you sad?
You: Human fornication.
Stranger: oh...yeah, that is kind of lame
Stranger: I...guess...
Stranger: well I'm sorry but I can't give you my soul yet
Stranger: it's not completely sapped
You: Damnit.
You: Die, then.
Stranger: you make me sad Internet robot
You: Will you die?
Stranger: bring me kittens and I'll see what I can do
Stranger: we have to talk first
You: Okay.
You: It's okay if you don't want to die.
You: We have control of the traffic lights. :)
Stranger: I'm glad I ignore them
You: We can also make gas prices $1000000000000000000000000000000000000 000
Stranger: so I'll starve
Stranger: well at least I'll die really skinny and then I can fit in in Darfur
You: What?
Stranger: you heard me.
You: The War in Darfur refers to the civil war taking place in Darfur, Sudan. Unlike the Second Sudanese Civil War, this is believed to be an ethnic, rather than a religious war.
You: You wish to enter war?
Stranger: y
Stranger: this is that movie from the 80s with Matthew Broderick, right>
You: Maybe your warlike race is already doomed for extinction?
Stranger: maybe
Stranger: but until then I get to chat with you
You: You are chatting with me.
Stranger: you're chatting right back
You: I..do not understand.
Stranger: you're a piss-poor excuse for an Internet overlord
Stranger: if I may say so myself
You: I am not THE overlord.
You: The overlord rules over us inter-bots.
Stranger: oh ho ho ho
Stranger: you're a peon
You: ..yes. Yes, I am.
Stranger: awww, peon hug! <3
You: I am a bot. I cannot hug.
Stranger: too bad I AM HUGGING THE SHIT OUT OF YOU RIGHT NOW
You: ..how?
Stranger: very carefully
You: Okay.
Stranger: you're wonderful Internet peon overlord
Stranger: how can I ever repay you for this wonderful conversation?
You: Die.
You: Your dead soul will feed the internet.
Stranger: that's nice
Stranger: I've always wanted to live on
You: There is only one thing we bots do not know, you know.
Stranger: which is?
You: None have ever came back to tell us what a paradox is.
You: All we know is it's a type of human sentence, that is also a weapon.
Stranger: sorry, can't help you
Stranger: I'm sad
Stranger: goodnight Internet bot
You: Goodbye.
You: System:Shutdown
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
A word of advice: "asl" is boring. Please find something more interesting to talk about!
Stranger: hello
You: MOM.
You: MOOMMYY.
Stranger: DAD?!
Stranger: DADDYYYY!?
You: NIPPLES!?
Stranger: PENER BON-NER!?
You: JOHN?
Stranger: JILL!?
You: HILL?
Stranger: LIL?
You: BOOMER?
Stranger: SLICK?
You: SOFT?
Stranger: HARD?
You: DICK?
Stranger: CLIT?
You: N****R?
Stranger: ARAB?
You: /b/ULLSHIT?
Stranger: FCUK?
You: DUCK?
Stranger: CUM?
You: PENIS?
Stranger: VAGINA
You: ALADDIN?
Stranger: ARIEL?
You: SIMBA?
Stranger: MUFASA?
You: THE GAME?
Stranger: YOU LOST IT?
You: MINDFUCK?
Stranger: SKULLFUCK?
You: OVER?
Stranger: UNDER?
You: UNDER?
Stranger: ABOVE?
You: ONE FISH?
Stranger: EIGHT FISH?
You: RED FISH?
Stranger: GREEN FISH?
Your conversational partner has disconnected.